convert ?

just a short announcement .

i 'think' i will convert my blog from all english post to mix language post due to err , dunno . bukan memang dari dulu lagi macam tu ka ? mix² . but more to english la dulu kan ? now more to malay la . penat ni mau buat post speaking² . maka real life english bertabur . haha !

oh . btw , aku gemuk balik sudah . naa ! kau tengok ba tu gambar . itu la ! makan lagi non-stop . badan aku macam babats sudahh . . shit ~ ba , bagus la tu shadel . teruskan usaha anda mengemukkan diri ye nak . heh !

nasihat untuk diri sendiri :)

dear shadel ,

bljr la dlu kw aa .
bljr lg penting dr fkrn kw tu .
jgn la kw fkr yg bkn² dlu .
kw fkr la psl study kw tu dlu .
apa yg kw fkr skrng tu suma xda² tu .
dia ska org len ?
biar la kn ? pa kw kisah ?
penting lg study . kn ?
kw fokus ja sma study .
jgn kw fokus benda len .
ada fhm ka ?
kw fkr psl dia ja tu pa hal ?
pa jgk motif kw tu ?
kw p sna utk bljr kn ?
bkn utk br-jiwang² .
mw ska² ank org .
bljr ! fkr psl ibu bapa kw .
adk² kw . harapan drng sma kw .
ingt tu ! fhm ? fhm ka ?
jgn la kw fkr psl dia ja 24 jm ,
smpai x ingt dunia .
talampau la jgk tu kn ?
kw xkn dpt apa² jgk tu .
lgpn kw tu kwn dia .
jd bwt la mcm perangai kwn .
ok ? fhm ? bgs ~

p/s :
ni post utk aq ja ni .
yg kmu² tu x kna mngena x pyh la bca .
tp kalo yg sdh trbca tu , bwt xtw ja la .
bwt mcm kmu trbca diary org . diam² ja ;)

♂

oi jantan , nasib la kau hensem , nasib la aku suka kau . kalau kau tidak hensem , kalau aku tidak suka kau , lama sudah aku sepak kepala kau guna kasut bola .

aku tau la ba , siapa juga aku ni . betina yang tidak cun melecun seperti yang kau idam - idamkan dan tidak sekurus macam lidi yang kau impi - impikan tu . trip ja aku tau dan expert .

tapi kan , aku pun manusia ba . aku ada perasaan . jadi . . kau agak² la ba cara kau layan aku tu . aku bukannya mau kau layan aku special² . oh tidak . layan aku macam perempuan ja cukup .

aku tidak mau kau layan aku macam kau layan geng kau . aku mau kau layan aku macam kau layan perempuan² yang kau sanjung sangat tu . tapi jangan over la . meremang segala bulu² aku .

wahai jantan , kau rasa la , apa yang aku minta ni pelik ka ? tidak juga kan ? kau rasa aku desperate mau perhatian kau ka ? mungkin la kan ? bukan mungkin lagi ni . memang pun !

tapi kalau aku lelaki pun kan , aku mau benda yang sama . tidak payah la deny² sana . kamu tidak berani cakap ja tu . mau control² macho la katakan . tampar kamu satu² guna mop !

oh , sesiapa yang tengah membaca ni , jangan salah faham ok ! aku cakap ni secara general , tidak kena mengena antara hidup , mati mahupun yang separuh mati . inallilah . .

ya la kali kan ? haha ! begini la jadinya kalau aku boring . tiada ba orang yang mau hiburkan hati aku sekarang ni . kesian aku kan ? deii . . mati la juga kalau macam ni seumur hidup :'(

you belong with me .

i LOVE this song ! lets sing along :)

you're on the phone with your girlfriend she's upset
she's going off about something that you said
she doesn't get your humor like i do

i'm in the room it's a typical tuesday night
i'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like
and she'll never know your story like i do

but she wears short skirts , i wear t-shirts
she's cheer captain and i'm on the bleachers
dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
that what you're looking for has been here the whole time

#1
if you could see that i'm the one who understands you
been here all along , so why can't you see ?
you belong with me , you belong with me

walking the street with you and your worn-out jeans
i can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
laughing on a park bench , thinking to myself
hey , isn't this easy ?

and you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
i haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
you say you're fine , i know you better than that
hey , what you doing with a girl like that ?

she wears high heels , i wear sneakers
she's cheer captain and i'm on the bleachers
dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
that what you're looking for has been here the whole time

repeat #1

#2
standing by and waiting at your back door
all this time how could you not know ?
baby , you belong with me , you belong with me

oh , remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
i'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're bout' to cry
and i know your favorute songs and you tell me bout' your dreams
think i know where you belong , think i know it's with me

can you see that i'm the one who understands you
been here all along , so why can't you see ?
you belong with me

repeat #2

you belong with me
haven't you thought it maybe
you belong with me
you belong with me

20 random facts . .

of course , this is about me , myself and i , saya , aku dan gue !

i look FAT ! heh ~

like it or not , err . . can't do anything about it . this is ME . you can't change me . i am who i am . so , DEAL WITH IT ! not trying to be bitchy and all . i'm just saying ~

1. i like to help people . heh ! padahal . . :p
2. i'm a friendly person . ya ka ?
3. i respect people IF they respect me .
4. i get jealous easily . like REALLY easily . like seriously !
5. i'm an attention-seeker . i bet you didn't notice that huh ?
6. i'm good at lying and faking it ! REALLY good ;)
7. i don't like being controlled . try ! i swear to god it won't work .
8. i can be nice and sweet and adorable . woot ! haha . .
9. i'm way beyond innocent . never been one in my entire life !
10. i'm unpredictable . so , don't expect anything from me .
11. i gotta 'thing' for black stuff . i wear a lot of black .
12. i'm good at giving advice . from good to bad to the baddest and crappiest advice ever !
13. i'm a procrastinator . oh , i bet you know that . right ?
14. treat me like shit and i'll treat you worst . so , BEWARE !
15. i used to be an overweight . pimpled-face . and have a bad hair .
16. i can be emo-ish sometimes . not something that i like thou .
17. i can be the cleanest AND dirtiest person in the same time .
18. i HATE being overprotected . hello ! i'm a big kid now .
19. i can get excited by such a small stuff :p
20. and lastly , i LOVE blogging . i had the freedom to speak out ! not like in the real life . no freedom at all :( boo real life !

there's more . but i think i'll share that some other time . there you have it ! 20 f**king facts ! haha :D

natasha . natasha . haha !

wahai sahabatku natasha fitriyannie hilarius . . ngm ka eja 2 nat ? haha ! kalo x ngm , ko bwt2 xtw ja la aa :p

m'mandangkan aq nmpk mcm ramai sdh nma aq ko post d blog ko . meh cni la aq balas jasa ko ya nak . naa , siap ngn gmbr ayu kta lg . hahaha . .

ui , cuba dlu bh ko kasi ubh tu setting di blog ko . geram aq x dpt cmmnt post ko jo ! bnyk ne aq mw cmmnt , mw bg pendapat bernas aq sna . sehh !

apa bh ne aq mw ckp . . oh ! aq bru t'bca blog ko td . x aq prasan bila ko post 2 . bru ja aq buka ne . sbb x dpt tdur kn . bljr bh aq td . hahaha . .

oh ya , yg psl lelaki 2 kn , actually ttda bh 2 . rekaan semata-mata . utk m'hiburkan hati aq . haha ! lek ko . kalo ada 2 , aq bgtau jgk ko nnti ;)

ko srh aq mrh c noel ka ? bh , noel , dr ko complain2 blog c nat , bgs ko bwt la bh blog ko sndiri . sna ko complain 10 page pn xpa . hehe ! jk .

stakat ne ja la aa . mw pagi sdh ne . mw bgn awl lg mw ambil c nat nnti . astagaa . apa bh ne , br'tabur suma ayt2 aq . hahaha . .

in my sweet 'dream'

i look better down-side-up . LOL . oh wait , i look like a monkey here !

having a great , charming , understanding , caring , cute , hot , good looking , genius and rich guy in a girl's life are like the top of a MUST HAVE in every girls must-have-list . or , is it just my list ? haha !

i know , its impossible right ? to have someone like that . and it doesn't make sense at all ! guys like that doesn't exist in this world . maybe there is , in my dream ! yeahh . its good to know that i can dream of having someone like that .

but thats just it , a must have is not something that you CAN have . it is something you dream of having . the getting it part is the hard one . maybe its easy for the ridiculously good looking girl , but not for me . all i can do is dream . a never ending dreaming session that i can ACTUALLY get that type of guy .

oh wait , there's actually a guy that i like . not the one that said he loves me and left me . hm . every guy that had been in my life tend to do that . but there this guy . i have an eye for him since err . .
i don't know . seems like forever !

i like him . i've fallen head over heels for him . he got EVERYTHING i wanted in my a-must-have-in-a-guy-list . except the understanding , charming and rich , i guess . but i don't really care about that . i like him just fine . just the way he is now .

but like i said , what i want is not something that i can have . i can only dream . some more , this guy that i've been crushing on likes other girl . yeahh . ouch!ouch!ouchhh! but thats common . right ? you like a guy . he likes other girl . you became the rebound girl . yada . yada . yada . .

but seriously , i want him ! badly ! i am actually pitying myself because of this . this is sad and pathetic . sheesh ! keep on dreaming shadel ! you will never get him . oh well , i guess "dreaming" of having him is enough ?

well , again , like i said , this is only in my sweetest dream . i hope it came true , i really do , that he'll be mine , someday , somehow . but i know better , dreams don't really come true for a girl like me .

wootwoot ! i smell desperationn . . no ? okayy . wow ! this is a very² long post . i wonder if people actually read this ? heh ! i don't care .
merepek ja kerja aku ne kan ? shadel² , kau teda kerja lain ka mau buat ? cukup² la kau berjiwang karat sanaa . .

yeahh !

found this on tumblr right after posting my previous post . as weird as it sounds , this cheer me up a bit . i'm gonna try some from the list . ttfn ! haha :D

i'm sad :(

why ? i can't really explain . i don't know how to explain actually . i don't even know where to begin explaining this sudden sad - ness :/

i'm sad about something . i'm devastated , no , thats too big , more like i'm disappointed to be exact . to myself , to them , to everyone , to EVERYTHING !

yeah . i think thats the reason why i'm feelin' sad . but i can't blame this on other people . can't i ? its me . the problem is me . i got issues . with people and stuff . can't say it here .

wait , is it because i'm too stressed out ? too emotional ? too tired ? is it because i think too much ? or is it maybe because of the loneliness ?

*sigh* i don't know . . its like everything doesn't seems right . doesn't seems wrong either . not in between too . so ? what is it ? whats going on ? why ? what happen to me ?

damn . i'm goin' crazy aren't i ? yeahh . i think thats the reason , i'm going to be a loco in no time if this 'feeling' keep messing up with my mind . seriously . .

:O

went out with BEN the other day . he's funny and . . how to say this in a good way ah , err , weird ? LOL . but its fun hangin' out with him . hehe ;)

oh yea , we went to watch this movie , and guess what ? he screams a lot ! kalah² pondan ne . seriously . . its embarassingg ! haha :D

p/s : sheesh ! the wind ba . ruining my style mann . . lmao :p